I decided, however, to persevere with ‘Operation Feel Good’. Sure this person kept pressing that button, normally I would have responded with some sharp retort but today I decided not to go there. She was more surprised at this than I was! I didn’t know I had it in me to resist, neither did she. When I did give it some thought, I ended up feeling sorry for her. Here was someone more miserable than I was, who probably could not wait to wake up and come into the office to make someone else’s day miserable. How sad was that? I saw her in a whole new light afterwards, nothing she said could faze me. My coworkers positively commented on my new ‘zen’ approach. I was honestly pleased with myself.
Step 4: Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff
I resolved not to let anything steal my joy. Sometimes we give power to trivial things. We internalize little things that hurt us and feed them until they are larger than life.
I remember someone said something hurtful to me one day. I went home and could not sleep. I turned it over and over in my mind. I should have said this or I should have done that. When what I really should have done was gone the heck to sleep!
People will say things but we are the ones who give it meaning, and sometimes our egos play a huge part in just how much meaning is assigned. I call this the ‘How Dare You’ factor. Don’t we all have a little of this? Some a little more than others, others extra large amounts? Oh come on, we know ourselves. Think about it. How often have you let your ego take the reins? ‘I don’t know who she thinks she’s talking to’? ‘Oh, heck no, he did not just do that to MY stuff!’ I’m the first to admit to buddying up to my ego, but really I need to limit our association. She’s a friend that will do the crime with you then watch your trial on tv with some popcorn. Who needs those kinds of friends? It won’t be easy but I’ll have to cut her loose.
Step 5: Appreciate Family and Genuine Friends
Notice I said genuine friends, not just acquaintances. Friends who are there through thick and thin with you, the ones who know everything about you and still stick around, who you can open up and talk to, tell exactly how you feel no matter what the circumstance and you know they’ll be right there when the dust clears. I don’t know about you guys but I have ONE such friend. I have many acquaintances but ONE friend. Sounds pathetic? It’s not actually, I tell my friend, Samantha, everything. When I do I know it stops with her. If I hear about it I don’t have to wonder who squealed, I know exactly who to confront. Needless to say this has never happened. She feels the same way about me.
Now family, that’s a whole different matter. Family has the good, bad and indifferent. With family, you sometimes just have to take them with a grain of salt. Sure your father might be a raving alcoholic, but what are you going to do? He’s still your dad. Some people sever all ties, still doesn’t change the fact that he’s your father. Mom might be a meddler but hey, she’s your mom. It doesn’t matter how far you distance yourself, your family is still your family at the end of the day.
In conclusion, life is short, learn to appreciate every moment of it. Sometimes it is filled with challenges but what doesn’t kill us does make us stronger. Be cognisant of the fact that there is a lesson to be learnt in every challenge. Learn the lesson or we’re doomed to repeat our mistakes. Love generously, let me say that again, love generously. Locking our hearts away only make us bitter. If the ones we love do not appreciate it, believe me, it’s THEIR loss.
